After his new flavor is stolen, Kool-Aid Man chases the thief through a magic doorway to the past.
Kool-Aid Man is a scientist!
Issue #6
In the “Wacky Warehouse,” which is sort of half-amusement park, half-Kool-Aid headquarters, Kool-Aid Man concocts a new flavor (like the scientist he is) in front of a trio of kids.
It’s weird seeing Kool-Aid Man pissed off
A grumpy guy made out of fire named Scorch sneaks into Kool-Aid Man’s lab and steals the paper containing the formula.
Scorch has the same voice as Dick Dastardly in my head
Kool-Aid Man and the kids chase after him though various Wacky Warehouse rooms. They end up going through the Wacky Back-Tracker, a magical time travel door, that takes them to the Prehistoric Age.
Cue Jurassic Park theme music
The chase continues, but Kool-Aid Man and the kids stop to help a talking purple dinosaur that’s stuck in a swamp – his name is Purplesaurus Rex.
Purplesaurus Rex, you know, like the Kool-Aid flavor!
Rex is thankful for Kool-Aid Man’s assistance and catches Scorch and the stolen formula as a thank you.
Purplesaurus Rex gets the formula back
Kool-Aid Man and the kids (plus Rex) take the Wacky Back-Tracker back home, then use it to send Scorch to the Ice Age.
Damn, that’s cold!
Thoughts
This felt like one of those Hostess ad comics that involve a superhero stopping a villain with the power of Twinkies, only instead of a single page, it’s a whole comic. Such a blatant promotion for Kool-Aid that just stopped short of Kool-Aid Man breaking the fourth wall to say “Hey kids, tell your parents to buy Kool-Aid!”
When I think about Kool-Aid, time travel’s not the first thing that comes to mind
The comic really does its best to make an entertaining story around Kool-Aid Man, but it felt too generic. To be fair, it’s hard to write for a character that’s just a giant, sentient pitcher of liquid that bursts through walls to start parties.
Back to the present
I have so many questions about why this was made, and by two major comic publishers no less! Marvel did the first three issues, and Archie did the rest. Thankfully, it was only given away as part of a mail-order promotion (with proofs of purchase) and never actually sold by itself. Considering there were nine issues, though, it seems The Adventures of Kool-Aid Man was deemed a failure.
All this was a Purplesaurus Rex origin story
It’s not completely awful, and some parts are “cute,” but I wouldn’t want to read another one. Also, I wish he had an actual name. I hate having to type Kool-Aid Man a million times in this review.
Rating
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