11 Year High School Reunion

Several months ago, I went to my 11 year high school reunion. Why not 10, you ask? Because the people in charge of the 10 year reunion dropped the ball. Like one of those Nestlé Wonder Balls, but instead of holding candy inside, this ball held disappointment.

First there were talks of having the reunion at the local mall, then at some guy’s farm in the middle of nowhere, then the school (no alcohol allowed), until finally settling on a random sports bar near the school. In the end, no one showed up.

The class that graduated after mine invited my class to their reunion, partly out of pity, but mainly for extra ticket sales. It took place at a generic event center…

The Reunion

Arrival – The first step of the journey. Yes, I will gladly take these things you put in my hands as you tell me it’s time to eat. Build your own tacos, you say? Sure, let’s follow the rules. Let’s build these tacos, dammit. We’re off to a good start.

I was hoping to reminisce with someone about the time he farted in math class. And that when he left to go to the bathroom, someone molded a Tootsie Roll into “poop” and put it in his chair. He wasn’t there.

Instead, I noticed a faint shadow in the corner. Who are you? Why do some couples share Facebook accounts? My ears feel damp all of a sudden. My eyes, too. Are these tears?

Hello, nice to meet you; sure, let’s talk about the best way to kill Sims in The Sims. Ahh yes, the classic swimming pool trick. Wait a second, where are you going? No, don’t go to the casino tables! It’s not real money. It’s not– I lost them. Never to be seen again.

A lone teacher stood in the corner. “Hello, you look great.” We said to each other in unison. Then silence. Should I tell him about the time a classmate slid a sandwich under his cabinet and it stayed there for about a month? I took my eyes off him for a second, then when I looked back, he was gone.

Hey, you. Yeah. You. I saw you bump into that mirror and your failed attempt to straighten it afterward. Don’t think no one saw this. I did. I see everything. And I remember everything…especially the past.

Spice Girls? Why are you talking about the Spice Girls when there are all these cupcakes over here? Don’t mind me. I’m only taking this photo for my blog.

Then they started doing karaoke, so that was my cue to leave.

“Good night,” I said to the security guard as I vacated the premises. “Good night,” I repeated to the reunion attendee smoking a cigarette outside. The more distance I put between myself and the reunion venue, the more dreamlike it became. It got further and further away. Fading like an old memory. What was a celebration of the past was now itself in the past.

But yeah, sure. I’ll probably go to the next one, I guess.